Becoming Competitive

Question: 

Can someone who is not at all competitive become competitive?

Gary's Answer: 

Yes, you just have to learn what competition is and more about how it works.

No one can escape life’s competitions, so everyone is “competitive” in one sense. Competition is nothing more than comparison. You are being compared by everyone who knows you. They are comparing you not only to others, but to their “ideal” of who you could be and the “you” of today with the “you” of yesterday. You are also comparing everyone around you in the same exact way. You are also judging yourself this way as well. These are the inescapable competitions of life.

When you say, “you are not competitive,” are you saying that you don’t care about how anyone else ranks you? You don’t care how your boss evaluates you? How those that love you evaluate you in measuring up to your potential? What your friends really think of you? Most importantly, are you saying you don’t care about how you evaluate yourself?

I think you really do. You REALLY REALLY do. I think you want to improve yourself and your place in the world. But you can only improve your place in the rule by improving the way others evaluate you in their comparisons to others, your potential, and today’s you to yesterday’s you.

You may not like the idea of being compared to others. Few of us do. But we cannot escape from the competitive nature of life. You can be competitive without liking the way you are compared just like you can eat without like the food. You still have to do it.

What you need is to learn how to be more successful at competition. You want to become more “competitive” in the sense of getting better at it. The more you understand about competition and how it works, the more you will enjoy. Since it helps you move toward your goals, becoming more competitive is actually the most enjoyable and pleasurable thing in the world.